Every once in a while, I see a comment about expats or just regular tourists engaging in the evil behavior of . . . over-tipping. Tipping by visitors (permanent or otherwise) is a place where cultures engage, with predictable controversy. Now for the record, I support large tips. I have history here. Long ago, my mother was a waitress at clubs like The Elks, and she earned only tips. Dad was a cop, and we were a lower middle-class family, basically one missed paycheck from poor. So those nights when my mom came home sad or even crying about a table of wealthy local businessmen leaving pocket change as a tip made an impression. We tip 20%. More if we like the service, or if it’s for breakfast (the work required of the staff is the same, but breakfast entrees are usually much cheaper). And we round up. I don’t tell other people how to tip, as I don’t have their experience, and they don’t have mine. I do call bull*bleep* about some of the complaints/justifications I hear about tipping.
One complaint I hear is that one shouldn’t over-tip because it raises prices. No one has yet explained to me what magic economic effect would cause this, beyond the fact the waiter has additional money to spend. If that were the case, if we don’t tip at all, will prices start dropping? There are studies which show tipping culture in general reduces prices, because the business owner has less cost (the diner is in effect replacing part of the cost of a salary). There is nothing to support the assertion over-tipping raises prices overall. Nada.
Maybe don’t over-tip because it makes the waitstaff expect higher tips, and they’ll provide some others with worse service if that person doesn’t share your over-tipping style? I am unsure why it is my responsibility to enable another diner’s tipping style. And are the servers at your favorite restaurant that petty? They don’t just do their job, short of a few examples where a really outrageous client gets “special (negative) treatment”?
Don’t over-tip because it disrespects local culture? Okay, time to come clean. I often hear this from people who railed on about embracing different cultures when they were back home, but now that the shoe is on the other foot, they’re saying the visitor has to adopt the local culture. As a visitor, it’s always a dilemma about how much local culture to adopt, to tolerate, or to reject. I wouldn’t overtip a waiter in France because it might offend them, thus defeating the intent of my trying to recognize their superior service. There I adopt the rounding up tradition for tipping. If I was visiting the Chinese countryside, I would not adopt the older locals’ habit of spitting; I would tolerate it, not making a big deal about it. And I won’t even speak of some local customs in other places that any decent human being would abhor. There is no hard-and-fast rule to one’s engagement with foreign cultures while traveling. Certainly as an expat one is more immersed in the culture and must be more aware. There are endless expat debates about paying mordita (bribes) as a part of local culture, versus working to change that unfortunate part of the culture.
To my mind, tipping is more of a personal choice than a cultural concern. In that regard, arguing about tipping is like arguing about flavors: “I like chocolate better than vanilla”. . . “No way, vanilla is way better than chocolate!” I don’t think less of those who tip less, unless of course they offer a poor excuse for doing so. I don’t care how others feel about my tipping, unless someone tries to tell me why I’m wrong.
“Keep the change, ya’ filthy animal!”